Those lovable little rascals have a way of knowing when you’re gone, leaving your house free for them to go exploring. Well, I think our government is much like a pack of raccoons that are always into mischief. While our friend the raccoon is busy looking in the refrigerator, opening all the cupboards, finding and snacking on whatever he can. The end result is similar to a bull in a China closet.

Now, enter our government. They have a different way of opening my front door and inviting themselves in. They do it with our U.S. census that the constitution says that all the government need do is to get a head count. The I.R.S. not only wants your dollars, but there’s much to be learned in the way our tax forms are constructed. Then come all your regulatory agencies each with their own kind of information to collect.

We’re down to: “How is Uncle Sam going to save me from all the poor choices I’ve made?” First of all, you have to have a problem. That means we need an agency full of bureaucrats to define the problem then do what they were hired to do, which is write regulations that may help and may not.

My favorite problem that Uncle Sam says he will fix for me is all that pesky rain that falls from the sky. They quite correctly determined after many studies and conferences that it was unlikely that they could control the flow of rainfall from a storm cloud. But, after it hit the ground, a rain drop is fair game to be regulated, to be charged a fee for crossing a state line and taxed if Mr. Drop finds himself stopped in a government reservoir.

The government agency that was lucky enough to win this very sought after boondoggle was the Environmental Protection Agency. I’m sure that all the top bureaucrats in government wished they could have been the chosen one as the potential for legions of workers at all levels to put Mr. Drop where he belongs for the greater good. So, as long as rain still falls from clouds and regulators maintain their zeal to regulate, this agency can have eternal life. Wouldn’t you know that the EPA has picked a name that nobody can be against: The Clean Water Act. This act dictates that the waters of our country be restored and maintained and their chemical, physical and biological properties be upheld. Again, who could be against cool clear water? So how far do you carry a mandate like this? After attending one of EPA’s hearings and reading extensively about the act, I’ve come to the conclusion that the EPA feels that everybody of water from the smallest puddle to every blue line stream on a topographical map is included in the Act.

What troubles me the most about government at all levels today is the total lack of trust that land owners could possibly also want to do what’s right. I can’t stand this idea that regulations, to be just, must paint all stewards of the land with the same brush that we paint the bad apple with. What we should be doing is rewarding those that are “slowing down water” as Mother Nature does.

A reward system would have a budget to operate with for pennies on the dollar compared to bureaucrats in Washington D.C. “TRUST ME,” I say and we will all win. Do I think that this is a realistic solution? Yes. Do I think this approach could be adopted? I think it would be marked dead on arrival at the EPA.

See Ya,

Jack