I’m getting out of word prison today

Yes I’ve had it with all these dismal words that have taken over our language. What a humiliation! So I’m changing the name of Jack's Blog to Jack's Perceptions/blog. For me blog is such a disheveled word. But how convenient, it rhymes with clog, like “come quick” my wife says “the toilet is clogged”. So why don’t we go down the alphabet together “A” gets a pass. But “B” reminds me of, I’m all bogged down.” "C", yes, “I’m coming” and I’ve got the toilet plunger. “D” you lazy dog your dogging it again. “E” escapes. But "F" for fog, like “My brains in a fog” or our state departments nick name is “foggy bottom”. “G” this blog is making me groggy “H” stands for your a hog, why can’t you share. "I" gets a pass. "J" is for jog, we have a winner what a healthy thing to do. Let’s spell cog with “K” instead of a C means your just 1 more Kog in the wheel. "L" is for a log, lying in the middle of the road, waiting for a chainsaw. “M” gets a by but “N” is for noggin which translates to the old noggin doesn’t work like it once did. “O” becomes Ogle, we can’t do that anymore. “P” is for plodding like the gate of a tired horse. “Q” there is an upscale city named Quogue New York where blogs are little read. “R” gets a by, but “S” is for Soggy should I say more. “T” is for nice togs your wearing today. “U” and “V” if I excused both you from the alphabet I wouldn’t exist. I’ve got to rethink that one. I’m running out of rhymes so W,X,Y and Z Heaven is waiting for you. I like this replacement word perception it’s somewhat mystical and sheds light into the writers inner workings. So let’s all escape now from those feelings that the word blog incites in a person. And instead become perceptive/ so blog you can now fade into obscurity.

See Ya,

Jack